And now, as our blessed holiday of bliss has dwindled down to these last few drops of the sweet strawberry lemonade that is our summer vacation, we begin to wonder about the single year that we have left in our lovely bubble that has sheltered us from the harsh realities of the real world.

     Some may say that has been a well deserved break from the shit hole of a jail that we call school....but I shamelessly say that this summer, as wonderful as it may have been, is only a space of time in which we seniors have to clear our heads and emotionally ready ourselves to do what we have longed for in the past .... we must stand alone..we must be accountable for ourselves alone, and make our own decisions...although i may have pined for it in the past i find myself running from the looming danger of adulthood...

  As i sit and ponder the upcomming year and and my life after high school...i find that i doubt myself.....am i really ready to accept the responsibility of handling myself?.... but i also reason...if i dont do it now will i ever feel ready?.....

but i digress.....

All i know is that i am most positively ready for another 8 or so months of treating my days with reckless abandon....and of not caring about the countless masses of people staring as i spin myself round and round in the middle of anywhere just so they can all be blurs of people that i am ready to meet... as long as their faces arent clear...

I am 17 years old and not ready to jump the nest .....and ill say it  proudly....

i laugh in the faces of the people who dare to call me afraid...for they do not have the pleasure of truly knowing me yet they shamelessly judge...

I AM NOT AFRAID

id be a fool and a liar to say that life will be cake...for there WILL be times when i am at the lowest of lows in my life...but i am not afraid...for i have two of the strongest weapons against depression.... faith in the stars and a good pile of friends....i will never be alone..maybe physically...but never spiritually...i know there are people out there that care about me....and i will make them proud....

but for now i will these last few months of my true childhood...
for THESE are the best years of our lives.. no matter what those college pamphlets say.....

KRYSTA

  So im moving to hollywood in 2 months & i cant help but be completely terrified.
     im going to be starting my first year at the american musical and dramatic academy to get a bfa in musical theatre. which is exciting but im soo scared about moving...i
m from south o.c. in dana point which is the city south of laguna on the coast..and im not your stereotypical oc girl..
im much more down to earth because my mother is n ot from down here..shes much more hard-knock...so im not insane..(well i am, but thats a completely different story for anoher blog =] )
i know im privleged but im not spoiled by any means..
but im so sheltered that im afraid of how i will handle myself in hollywood...i know i have an advantage over the other kids..i took a year off so im older,and most of them are moving from out of state and have never been there before..i live only like 45 mins away w/o traffic hehe..but what am i going to do..
uggh i know im probably being irrational and teenagery..
but im scared....
what if i trust the wrong people..
or i loose myself and my spirit?
i dont know im just so terrified of making the wrong move..